Ticket Please!!

On that sultry June afternoon, I was there at the Puraani Delhi railway station to see Daddy off. Just like any conscientious father from the last generation (who has spent a life abiding by the "law"), he took objection at me not buying the platform ticket.
We were already late for his train and I sure didn't want to add more fireworx (literally, it was this hot) to the teriffic afternoon that was. I hurriedly marched towards the platform and failing all railway enquiry updates, the train was right there...@ right time.
I helped Daddy with the luggage, bought him some refreshment and after some emotional exchanges through the train window, I headed back home.
Just then it dawned upon me that I neither possessed a train ticket nor a platform ticket. I was inside the station and to get out...I had to make my way through the station exit....evading the watchful eye of that ticket-checker....who is empowered by the Indian Law to fine me for being ticketless!

Butterflies in my stomach!! I give a damn to office deadlines...I watch horror movies sitting back easy...I bargain unabashed...I play the fearless social activist anywhere, anytime....n here I was....fearing the consequences of having broken the "law"... of having stepped on the railway platform without spending those 2bucks...n it could cost me...anything that sarkaari babu's mood demanded.

I marched cluelessly towards the exit not thinking how to handle the not-so-pleasant situation that dark,clumsy,smelly,pot-bellied checker possibly could create.

I remember it vividly like those slow-motion scenes! My slingbag around me...I propped my spectacles on my nose...saw the checker examining the tickets of the people ahead of me...looking at him in the eye....losing my breath completely in that moment....n in no time I was past that fellow and a "free-bird" again.

I'll end this note with the only thing that crossed my mind at that moment n really hurt me hard:

"I am a well-bred upper middle-class kid- convent educated,read n topped at one of the best degree colleges in this part of the country, employed in the elite, star-league semiconductor industry, specialist engineer, international work experience, earn handsome, spend n dine at the hippest places of the city.....I pay my taxes honestly (infact foolishly...did I tell you that its been 1year and they are not sending across my tax refund), follow "most" of the rules, very happily I let the Mayawatis, the Lalus, the Kalmadis, the Badals of this world eat into my humble pie.....I harmoniously co-exist with the reality that a face that smiles at me every morning from the newspaper frontpage has bloated his kitty with my fortune....n my countrymen's fortune too!(wat was the amount they said...350 crores?? n they also say that he has been hanging around the town nailing some innocent women n the police doesn't fancy any harassment charges against him!...afterall Netaji's heart valve isn't working properly...How can he be in jail??Never mind, he is sleeping away to glory in the luxury ward of the most expensive hospital in the city)... I sleep every night to the fact that the Jessica Lalls and the Priya Mattoos didn't live to see this day and the Manu Sharmas, Santosh Singhs n Vikas Yadavs are partying the night out in some flashy night club.....I see the hefty middlemen n contractors steal that loaf of bread which could have gone down the bowels of the toddler who will sleep hungry on the footpath today......

I "accept" all this reality.....I see all this reality "getting accepted" and still the only thing I fear out of all this that can make me shudder is: I AM ON THE PLATFORM WITHOUT A PLATFORM TICKET!

Suddenly, I feel so worthless as a person,as a citizen. Do I already know what I should be doing in my life??

Signing Off.